My mother bought this
chair in 1961 for 5 shillings. It
was neither a bargain nor a rip off. This is what it used to look like, so you can see why I liked it. Trouble was, the velvet was worn to
sheer, and a cloud of ancient dust flew up each time you touched it.
I asked three
upholsterers about doing the job.
Two said it would cost £1000; one said it would cost £500 plus materials
and talked rather a lot about gluing on braid; one refused the job
altogether. In the end, I decided
to do it myself. How hard could it
be?
These are my top ten tips:
2. Pick a
day when you want a distraction – planning permission’s been refused; your
parents are splitting up; your daughter’s boyfriend has got a job in Bali and
she’s decided to give up her university place to follow him there.
3. Be brave,
be very brave.
4. Use the old pieces as a pattern but don’t be surprised if they bear no relation
to what will actually fit.
5. Think of
it not as a chair but as a character out of Beauty and the Beast.
6. Under
whose moral code are wrinkles in velvet wrong?
7. Hold the
tacks in place with your fingernails.
It’s what they’re for.
8. If anyone
comments say “it’s meant to be like that”.
9. If they
persist, hand them a pair of scissors and a hammer and say “I’d like to see you
do a better job”
10. Be jolly pleased with yourself and get started on another.
